Tuesday, November 1, 2016 || 11:57 AM || 1 comments ||

Higher ups.

These are the type of individuals that'll pop up whenever we mention about respect.

But for this part, I'll specifically be focusing on parents.

It's true, I agree. We should respect them. They put food on the table, they paid for your educations , provided all the necessities, gave shelter,  aaaaand everything else you already know and reminded again and again.

Yes, we should respect them.

But I do believe that,  it's not just a one way thing. It goes both ways.

" heh? They are my children. Why should I be the one giving respect. "

There is a fine line between respect, and worship.

Even respect can be broken down into 2 types; because you love em, or simply because, you have to.

But again, I believe, it goes both ways.


Because you made us.
With no choice we have to live this life.
Whatever choices you made.
Good or bad.
Especially when mostly are bad.
Especially, when those choices are for your own good, not ours.
We have to live through it.
Just tears, but no complaints.
You mock, you abuse, you hurt.
We still living the life.
The life you gave us.

So yea.
I do believe we deserve a bit of fucking respect.

Truthfully my life is not that bad.
I am alive still, that's good.
But it could have been better

Could have been better.

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Please. Don't.

Friday, October 14, 2016 || 4:41 AM || 1 comments ||

Was born into this world.
No guidance, no purpose in life.
Only these "commands" were given.
Again and again...

"Make us proud."
"Be successful."
"Don't embarrass us."

...but how?

"Guide me. Please."
Again and again, I asked.
All I get was more questions.
I need answers.

Took everything into my own hands.
Tried this and that.
Succeeded some, failed a lot.
I tried. I gave all I got.

Publicly shamed.

"Stupid boy."
"You can't even get this right?"
"What did you learn at school?"


I asked them..

"Guide me."
"What I should do."

That was what I get.

I stopped trying.
I stopped asking.
I just, stopped.


But still.

Life goes on.
Adult life started.
Still clueless.
Still confused.

Funny enough.
Despite being put down again and again.
I do have a plan in life.
On what I want to become.

And here goes another chapter of my life.

Was thrown into another world of pain.
Doing things I don't want to do.
Everything I have planned, dropped them all.
For this thing I don't see myself doing.
Not in this life.

But nevertheless, I am here.
Made a lot more mistakes than progress.
A lot more disappointments.
A lot more pain.

I want out.
Take me away from this place.
I am sick of this life.
No guidance. No purpose.


Luckily though...

Everything changed.
Met a lot of new people.
I started learning again, because of these people I met.
I started living my life again, because of these people I met.

I feel better.
I feel great.

It took a while.
But I get what I wanted since a very long time ago.

I am glad.
I am happy.

I never stopped learning.
I never stopped living.
But one more question remains.

"..what's my purpose in this life?"

This biggest question of all.
Haunts me every time.
Drives me insane.
I need to know.


Until I met a special someone.
Who taught me what's more to life than just, this.
Who taught me what is it means to be alive.
Who taught me what it means to love someone.

But most importantly.
My purpose, in this life.
Now I get it.

You don't live your life just for you.
You live it for others as well.
That's how you stay alive.
That's how you stay, sane.


With no guidance, there will be no love.
With no love, there will be no purpose.

Don't reproduce.
If you can't do any of those three.
Worst, if you can't explain any of those three.


Hello, old friend

Wednesday, August 3, 2016 || 2:55 AM || 0 comments ||

It's been a while.
Been through so much.
Lots of memories, lots of experiences.
I shall write it here, once again.
Just for the sake of, writing it.

.....and some other stuffs that made me who I am today.

See you soon.

Suddenly, about my dream in video making

Friday, June 21, 2013 || 5:21 AM || 0 comments ||

Oh when will I get joo~

First of all, I am a big fan of trailer videos and if possible, I'd like to make lots of trailer type videos. Not just that, I am also super interested in directing and shooting scenes, especially those scenes which can fit nicely into trailer videos. But yea, for my dreams to come true, I will be needing the right gadgets and tools, which is kinda impossible for now.

Ideas, lots of ideas running in my head whenever I watch trailer videos, be it movie trailers or random university project trailers. Whenever I watch em, with the right song, I will start imagining a plot that fits the song, and starts to direct the scenes in my mind. Having the right atmosphere, effective camera angles and scenes transition, I just created one awesome trailer video! But yea, only limited to one viewer.....because it's my mind.....and I am the only one....okay okay of course you get it lol.

Again, to make whatever that is happening in my head into reality, I will be needing them gadgets. Just give me a DSLR capable of recording high quality videos, and Adobe Premiere Pro (yeap, with just Premiere), I will be able to make awesome videos! But of course not immediately lol, will need to train my directing and shooting skills so it'll match as close as possible to whatever that's in my head.

Sure I have been having this dream for quite a long time, but I wasn't this enthusiastic before. All this thanks to this one club I've recently joined; MILE club. MILE stands for The Multimedia Initiative for the Language of English. To summarize what they do, from what I know, they organizes some English classes or meetings or events (no idea what's the right term) for the members to enhance their English and communication skills. They also organizes dramas, using the university's main hall as their venue which can be enjoyed  by not just the students, but outsiders as well; the biggest highlight of MILE's activity.

Okay enough about the club, back to the main point; what exactly did they do that made me this enthusiastic. Yes, they organizes dramas, while doing that, they will also make trailers to promote the upcoming drama they are working on. Yes, those trailer they made, grabbed my attention immediately.

Of course the trailers they made are not comparable to those awesome movie trailers out there, but they really did a good job, I mean it, really. While watching their trailers, my hands got itchy, my head starts to imagine all the awesome scenes and transitions that can be added into the trailer to make it even more awesome! If only they give me a chance by, well, lending me a camera and gimme the plot for the trailer, I shall help them direct and shoot the scenes as awesome as possible! 

For your information, no I am not telling you that I can do better than what they did, just sharing my feelings on being able to make my own interpretation of the trailers they made; same plot but with my directions and making sure each scenes are made as movie-like as possible.

Below are some of the trailers they made to promote their dramas. For those of you with high standards, please lower your expectations. Not in a bad way though, truthfully they are not professionals, but the efforts they put in making these trailers deserves a salute.

1. Bonnie and Clyde:

2. Merchant of Venice:

Okay, time to promote myself too lol. I do have some videos I made myself (only 2 for now), but with limited resources and video editing skills. All the scenes used are not recorded by me, I got it from others. With my limited editing skills, I made sure each scenes used fits the mood of the song. Both videos I made are for my sis' wedding. Er...enjoy?

1. Sis' Engagement - Totally made this just for fun.

2. Sis' Wedding - Kinda a rushed product. Tried making it as movie trailer as possible lol.

That's all about my dream for now. Just sharing my dreams and thoughts, since this is the only way I can express myself. Hoping things will go as I wanted in the future.

suddenly, a movie review: MAN OF STEEL

Saturday, June 15, 2013 || 8:09 AM || 0 comments ||

I sure haven't post anything here for quite a while. Well, here I am, again, writing random stuffs and farts.

As the title says, yes recently I went to the cinema for the movie Man of Steel; one of the movies I highly anticipate. Been watching all the trailers and TV spots before the movie was out, it looked so damn good; the new and modern look of Superman, General Zod, and all the visual aspects of the film. So yea, suddenly feels like wanna write a review for the movie, even though no one cares anyway.

From this point onwards, the following review is fully written by a person who is not a certified movie reviewer and doesn't know THAT much about Superman and whatever happens in his universe. Just a random dude Well, here it goes.

 **Might contain spoilers**

First part of the film, really starts from the beginning; the planet Krypton and all the crazy things that happens inside. It was a very good introduction in my opinion, not to mention well executed too. No problem for this part...except what comes after.

The scenes in this movie (after the awesome introduction), truthfully, are not what I was expecting from a movie I highly anticipate (well, things like this happens).

The scenes feels kinda unsatisfying for most parts. Fine they tried not to do a typical superhero movie plot; starts from a boy, then his school life, gradually learns this and that, then finally, becomes superhero. Instead, the movie jumps straight into the action; Clark Kent is all grown up, helping people and all, searching for the truth about himself. All about his past are shown as flashbacks instead, which is, an okay idea if well executed. Well, here goes my opinion regarding this part.

First of all, this movie is a reboot, everything must start from the beginning. Everyone wants to know how the journey starts for Clark. Fine, do not make it TOO long, but just make sure it is long and interesting enough for the audience to be able to grasp the life of Clark from the learning period until he becomes Superman. From this, the audience will get to connect with the character Clark in a more effective way and will dramatically (and positively) reacts to whatever happens next. I find this really helpful, ESPECIALLY for Man of Steel since it is the first proper reboot for Superman and for modern audience (no, Superman Returns doesn't count). INSTEAD, they start Clark's journey straight to when he is already an adult, knows his abilities, and starts doing what he does best. And not to mention, they were like "okay, let us put some short flashbacks here and there, so people will quickly and roughly understands what he has gone through during the past". Because of this, everything feels so fast. People got bored and doesn't connect well with the character Clark due to lack of deepness in the story of his past. From this, the audience will look forward to the action scenes instead, rather than getting to really know the new Superman.

Awesome action and fighting scenes, what a Superman movie needs. How was it? I must say, it was good, really good, for most parts. From the part when General Zod made his first contact with earth, it starts to go uphill from there, I meant action-wise. The explosions and destruction scenes are amazing, same goes for the fight scenes. I must say, from watching all the action and fighting scenes, I became a big fan of the character Faora; one of General Zod's minions. The actor Antje Traue really did a good job playing Faora; how she fights, how she behaves, her expressions, really makes her a badass character. Plus, she is hot....huehuehuehue. Don't get me wrong though, General Zod is awesome as well, but Faora has more awesome action scenes than Zod which kinda overshadows Zod's awesomeness in the movie.It took quite a while until Zod finally steps down for epic fighting scene. It starts well, but after a while, it gets kinda messy and draggy. They both just flew around kinda too much at some point. But at least the fight ends well.

Oh yea, the visuals. Well, as expected from Zack Snyder, the visuals are top notch. Some movements are kinda cartoony though, but yes I do understand, the process wasn't easy, at least those scenes still looks good and satisfying. The actors also did a very good job, no awkward acting whatsoever. As for the soundtracks, all of the songs fits the scenes really well, can't wait to get my hands on the original soundtrack lol.

Well, too summarize everything, Man of Steel is a good superhero movie, but not one of the best though. Almost, but no. Why? Because on how they handle the scenes as I mentioned earlier. They should at least include more back story for Clark at the right moments so that everything doesn't feel rushed and audience will get to know Clark even deeper, hence connecting themselves with the character. Other than that, everything looks and sounds great. The action and fighting scenes are what you would expect from a modern superhero movie, especially Man of Steel; awesome and satisfying. If you are a Superman fan and your main reason is to watch the new Superman in action but doesn't care about how deep the back story is (as long as there are enough to keep you going), then this movie is for you. Not just for fans of course, even the non-fans will be able to enjoy this movie, at least for most parts.

Due to my awesome level of anticipation towards this movie, I shall give it a 8/10. But, if I wasn't looking forward to it and watching it just for fun, I might give it 7.5/10.

The End.

p/s: Please ignore any grammar mistakes lol.

suddenly, about marriage

Tuesday, March 26, 2013 || 12:09 AM || 0 comments ||

This may come as a weird topic, coming from me. No no I am not getting married, I am just posting this to show my concerns on the said topic....MARRIAGE!

Some of my friends got sister got cousin got married. I've been observing all these people that got married, from my point of view, some of them still have no idea what to do after they got married. Like, "Yay, I am married now wohoo!! I own her now yeah!! what's next?". Yes, my concern are the guys, not the ladies, since guys will be the head of the family, so yea, they sure have a lot of work to do after marriage.

This post might butthurt some married couples, but, sooner or later, someone should tell them about this anyway. So yea, continue at your own risk.

Firstly, to get married, there are 2 starting points that can affect the flow of your marriage, in a good way of course (if the plan goes well) :

  1. Secure everything before you get married; house, furniture, car, and everything necessary for you and your future wife to live.

  2. Secure everything on the go, but, with a plan. The plan of course, requires money...and a functioning brain.

For the first point, it is considered the most convenient way to start your new life with your wife. This is to ensure that, after you got married, there will be no need to scratch your head on how to get all the stuffs. To put it in easier way, just "Take her, and go".

As for the second point, yes of course, money is the main point for the plan to work. But the benefits in this is that, you and your wife can share ideas on how to start the new life; what kind of house, where to live, etc. Again, money is the main factor, make sure you are awesome, financially, before going for this method, so that whatever you want, you can just grab it.

Still, many of these people I've seen that got married, they always go for the 2nd starting point; Secure everything on the go, but the thing is, they are weak, financially. So, when this happens, it will lead to the most common survival instinct used by these people; stay at in-law's or own parents' house.

Of course they will welcome you for staying at their house, but how long will it last?

By staying in their home, yes you are still their child, but the privileges are not the same anymore because now, you are staying as a guest, yes I repeat, a guest. Which means, to stay there, you have to behave like a guest, in other words, maintain good behavior, since they are the one's who is helping you right now, you have no choice. Well, these are what I meant by "good behavior" :

  • If you want to eat/ cook something, try and use your own supplies as much as possible.
  • Since you are staying there, why don't you contribute some money for the bills? Seriously, without you staying there, their bills should reduced, not the other way around.
  • Respect your parents even more now, by this I meant, do not argue whenever things didn't go as you want (in the house). For example like, when there are no food supplies, when they ask you to do some cleaning but you don't feel like doing it, etc.
  • Try to find a house as soon as possible. Once you get one, get out of their house. The sooner you leave the house, the better. This is to make sure their views towards you will not turn negative.
All these points comes from my own experience. No I am not married yet lol, what I meant is from observing some of the married couples I managed to get my eyes on. No, not stalking strangers, I meant, the ones that are close to me...ok let us continue.

Okay, not just guys, there are some advice for the girls as well. We have to admit, there are some girls that are really spoiled, like really really spoiled, and has no idea that she's already married and still acting like a brat. I've seen this kind of person, like, LIVE. These are some of the shits happened that I still happen to remember:

  • The mother cooked some dish (the daughter and the son in law are off to work and will be home late.). Of course, the whole family ate, the amount of rice left is really low. Once the daughter got back, she cooked ANOTHER dish especially for her husband, which then she happens to find out the rice is not enough. She went nuts, blaming her mom for everything, saying things like "Why didn't you tell me this??! Now how is HE going to eat with no rice?!?!", like as if it's her mom's responsibility now to take care of her husband as well. Not to mention the dish she cooked, is from her mom's supplies...which she never contribute back after using. Also, who cooks a dish without checking the rice first....genius.
  • The mother and father packed her daughter's stuff nicely inside a box, so she can take it back to her new house. The daughter then found out her stuffs got packed, and starts to go nuts again. Saying stuff like, "Why are you doing this to me?! You really want me to get out izzit?! You just don't want me here anymore huh?!", and then later, the daughter was like refuse to talk to her parents and all, acting like a spoiled child. First of all, YOU ARE MARRIED, OF COURSE YOU SHOULD GET OUT. It is good enough for her parents to provide a temporary place to stay, and even more, they helped packing stuffs for her, which she should be the one to do it. If I am not mistaken, her parents never once said anything similar to "get out".

These 2 stories are the only ones that I can remember clearly. But yea, this is the kind of person that needs a smack in the face once a while ya know. Someone should really knock the sense out of them sooner or later....or they can just read this blog post. Please please and please respect your parents, especially when they are being nice to you and all. Please do not abuse their hospitality, with you staying at their place, they have suffered enough already, please do not add more salt to their wounds by being such a bitch and all.

Back to the guys. Lastly, these are some final tips to make your life easier once you got married. Some of it actually comes from common sense:

  • Be matured. Duh.

  • Maintain good relationship with in-laws. Refer back to the list I made on "good behavior living in parents' house".

  • If you went for option 2; Secure everything on the go, make sure you maintain your finance wisely. Never buy anything useless which can affect you from buying the necessary stuffs like house, furniture, etc. Once you have the necessary stuffs, then you can spend on the useless stuffs, which you must spend wisely as well, so you won't end up eating instant noodles everyday.

  • .....that's all I guess?
Sorry for the long post. Well, I do admit that this blog post seems like a newbie's view on marriage, but trust me, most of them still need someone to tell them all this. If you think life after marriage is difficult, guess what, that means you are still not ready for it, in other words, DON'T GET MARRIED. All you need is love? Bullshit. You need love and money! If love can feed you and give you shelter, then why not, just stick to love then.Remember, this ain't wonderland.

.....and I still have no Idea why I post this shit which has nothing to do with me......oh well.

Being Myself

Tuesday, July 3, 2012 || 3:50 AM || 0 comments ||

Should I just show it? Or hide it.....

Changes, I can see that everywhere. Almost all the people I know have changed. Some changed to a better person...and some don't. Should I change too? Should I not be myself and become somebody else instead?

Truthfully, being myself is not so bad. I am unlike those Otaku kind of guy, I am perfectly normal...well...normal enough. I am not that "Cool" guy but I can engage in normal conversation and socialize with others when needed. What I am lacking now is a better socializing skills (better, to some people)....such as being super funny and act crazy enough to grab people's attention. I can't do that, that's just not my style. I did try, failed badly.

University life changes people, including me in some ways. Some of my friends changed too, most of them became a better person, as for the others....maybe they took a wrong turn?

During my early days as a university student, I do want to show everyone I have changed, which I did. Whenever I am with others, especially my high school friends, I will start to show my "changed" version. After a while, I get tired of it, not being myself is just a waste of time. Luckily I realized that early enough before being labelled as a douche or anything related...

Now, I am being myself all the way, proudly. Still, someone I know didn't survive the "University Changes". During high school, he was like a normal kid and not so douchy (or douchey?). Once started university.....there he goes. Starts showing he has contacts with chicks, showing pictures of himself with other chicks, starts to act like he is cool and awesome whenever we hang out, using sarcasm level DOUCHE BAG, and so get the idea.

From his actions, desperate might be the right word for him. He wants us to know he has changed, he can talk to girls now, he can socialize now, dafuq TAKE A FUCKIN CHILL PILL DUDE! He even went as far as calling me "Forever alone", just because I wasn't being like him, ya know, showing picture of myself with chicks and all. LOL what a noob...

As for this other dude I know, he is a dick by default, but he hides his dicky-ness with a fake personality; being a crazy, funny, happy fun fun dude. His fake personality worked, he has lots of friends, he can easily talk and make friends with others, a fun dude to hang out with, good for him. I was fooled by his fake-ness, but after hanging out with him for quite some time, his true self was shown to me, and I must say, I am disappoint.

I did say to myself, "maybe I should learn from him, be like him, so I can be moar awesome", but naahhh, later I found out being myself is waaay awesome than that crap.

Even though both of them are kinda fucked up, they are still considered as friends to me. We still hang out and all, I will just act cool and let they be whoever or whatever they want to, nobody's perfect anyway.

Well, we can change, it's good. But make sure those changes still refers to your original other words, just an upgraded version of you, but not a totally different version of you.